Staff Photo by Tim Barber Kate Walker, top right, 35, watches her five children during swim time at their home in Chatsworth, Ga. Mrs. Walker is the wife of National Guard soldier First Sgt Darrell Walker, an electrical engineer for Shaw Industries. 1SG Walker will be in Iraq when his sixth child is born. From left are Miranda, 12, David, 2, John, 4, Tyree, 10 and Ben, 1, in the arms of his mother.
An important part of the Walker family's Father's Day celebration is missing this year: the father.
First Sgt. Darrell Walker, of Chatsworth, Ga., is in Afghanistan today with the Dalton-based 1/108th Cavalry Regiment of the Georgia National Guard. He's been away from home since the start of 2009 and won't be back in time to see his eighth child born in January.
"Being away from my family is the worst part of being deployed," 1st Sgt. Walker wrote in an e-mail. "Our small children are particularly tough because I can't explain to them where I am and why, plus, they change so rapidly at that age, it's like I miss a whole big piece of them that I'll never get back."
When Kate and Darrell Walker married almost six years ago, Mrs. Walker had two daughters: Miranda, now 12; and Tyree, 10. He had two daughters with his first wife: Rilley, 10; and McKenna, 8.
They've since had John, 4; David, 2, and Benjamin, 1. Their next blessing, due in January, will finally complete the picture, according to Mrs. Walker.
The full-time wife and mother has managed to run the household and school her children at home while her husband has been abroad.
It's a tough situation that many military spouses find themselves in, said Barbara Keltch, who lives in Ooltewah with her husband and three children ranging in age from 13 to 18.
Sgt. Timothy Keltch spent a year in Iraq with the Dayton, Tenn.-based detachment of the Tennessee National Guard's 1/181st Field Artillery Battalion between 2007 and 2008.
"It can be (hard)," Mrs. Keltch said. "You have to make all the decisions and be the good guy and the bad guy at the same time."
Mrs. Keltch was very involved with her husband's unit's Family Readiness Group, and she said the support from other military spouses was key.
Mrs. Walker also works with her Family Readiness Group. And when she's not chatting with other members, she maintains her sanity by embracing the fact that she's not going to be able to do everything herself.
For example, she said, some of the children had to forgo softball this year because she just didn't have time to shuttle them to and from practice.
"You learn to weed out what you can weed out in your family life so you can maintain some continuity in your family time, so that you don't have insanity in your house," she explained.
The family spent a recent afternoon creating artwork to send 1st Sgt. Walker. The younger children made brightly colored footprints while the older ones created more elaborate paintings.
Tyree, 10, couldn't contain the pride she feels for her father as she painted.
"He's in the Army, and he fights for us," she said. "I'm going to be in the Army with him one day."
The first sergeant is equally as proud of his children. He said has been enjoying a DVD of good wishes from them and plans to send them some footage back.
"Father's Day is not going to be a depressing day for me just because I am not home," he said. "My family does practical, loving things for me all the time, whether I am deployed or not. I try to do the same for them."
Mrs. Walker says she feels the same way. Though the family might not go camping this year, as they would have if 1st Sgt. Walker were home, they'll think of him fondly and then go on with their day-to-day lives.
"We'll talk to him (today), but we won't be sad about it," she said. "This is a choice our family made. You can't cry over everything. I made my peace with it before he left, and now we're okay."
