Restaurant review: The Heart Attack Shack answers the call for deep-fried hunger

Although this mountain of food is huge, it's not Heart Attack Shack's biggest burger. That's the one-pound burger, which involves four patties stacked high. Not for the faint of heart.
Although this mountain of food is huge, it's not Heart Attack Shack's biggest burger. That's the one-pound burger, which involves four patties stacked high. Not for the faint of heart.

The name says it all: Fans of salads, turn away! The Heart Attack Shack in East Ridge caters to all things fried and cheesy, and they're not ashamed of it.

Burgers are stacked high with toppings, fries made over a dozen different ways and even nachos and chicken wings are on the menu of what is definitively a palace of cholesterol.

THE SPACE

This isn't your average greasy spoon. As expected from a restaurant that opened only two months ago, the Heart Attack Shack is clean and orderly; the black-and-white tiles still look shiny and new. The space looks decidedly '50s, like the style of old-time diners.

If you go

› Where: Heart Attack Shack, 4345 Ringgold Road› Hours: 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Monday-Thursday, 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Friday and Saturday; closed Sunday.› Price Range: Burgers $4.49-$8.49; fries $1.79-$2.99; wings $2.99-$8.99, nachos $6.99› Phone: 423-803-5900

photo No toppings are mandatory for your burger, but I'm the kind of guy who orders nine things on his pizza. The packaging the food comes in is no-frills, which somehow is fitting for its contents.

The building itself is small, and seats maybe 16 to 20. That doesn't seem like a big issue, though. Despite the lack of a drive-through, a couple of people ordered their food to go while I was there. Based on how hot my food was, I can't imagine the quality will drop too much on a drive home.

THE MENU

Oh boy, the menu. It manages to be simple but endlessly diverse at the same time. There are only four things for sale at the Heart Attack Shack: wings, burgers, fries and nachos. However, orders may be customized in what feels like hundreds of ways.

There are seven kinds of cheese for your burger, three burger sizes, nine bonus toppings (including waffle fries and a fried egg) and seven sauces. And that's just the burger!

Boneless and bone-in wings are available in nine sauces, from strawberry chipotle to what I ordered, ghost pepper hot sauce. The fries come in four differing cuts and seven seasoning options. You can also "give them a heart attack," which I was not brave enough to do. That involves covering them in cheese, jalapenos, bacon and the restaurant's signature "heart-attack sauce."

The most unbelievable part is the price for all of this.

All of those toppings- lettuce, pickles, tomato and four extras - for the burger? Free. Cheese is a mere 50 cents.

Seasonings on the fries? Free. And nachos may be piled high with extras for free.

It's like they are encouraging me, pleading with me, to order extra food. Naturally, I did. How could I resist?

Another surprise is the drinks menu, or lack thereof. There isn't a soda fountain; customers pick out a bottled or canned drink of their choice from a fridge. I thought this a bit strange at first, but it did allow the restaurant to offer drinks not necessarily available from a fountain. The prices are no more expensive than a drinks machine, so it wasn't an issue for me.

THE SERVICE

No extended wait times here. You either call ahead or simply place your order at the counter and wait. The wait was a bit longer than I anticipated, but given that I ordered three things, it was understandable. Other patrons had simpler orders and got their food a bit faster than me, so I assume the fry wizards in the kitchen had their hands full. And I do mean full; I could barely get my hands around my burger once it had been put together.

photo Despite the wanton displays of fried goodness, there's a certain homeyness to the restaurant. It's simple and unpretentious.

THE FOOD

I wanted to get the full experience here, so I ordered a half-pound burger complete with fixings, waffle fries and a four-piece wings, smothered in ghost pepper sauce.

It would be easy to make a mediocre burger and hide it with miles of toppings, but that's not what happened at all. The meat was juicy and cooked perfectly, and was easily noticeable amongst the jalapenos, bacon, grilled mushrooms, Thousand Island dressing, pickles and other toppings.

Speaking of the toppings - I'm glad I went alone, because I was genuinely self-conscious trying to wrap my mouth around this mountain of meat, this shrine of gluttony.

The toppings all worked well together . The sweetness of the Thousand Island complemented the pickled spice of the jalapenos. The cold pickles contrasted well with the hot burger, and the bacon's crunch provided texture against the torrent of tomato, lettuce, onion and mushrooms.

I can safely say this was an amazing burger that I would recommend to any meat eater. Shout-out to the bottom bun, because by the end of my meal, that poor thing had done its best to keep everything intact. A couple more minutes and the whole thing might have fallen apart under sheer caloric weight.

The fries were fantastic. I'm a bit of a purist when it comes to my fried potatoes, so I ordered waffle fries with no extra seasonings. They came out hot, fresh and wonderfully crisp and helped take the heat off my hot wings and burger. A large order was only $2, but don't be fooled into thinking that's their largest size. No, at the Heart Attack Shack, medium means small, and sizes go up to Flatliner XL.

The wings were very good, especially for a burger place. I ordered four in a ghost-pepper sauce, in which they were absolutely dripping. I've eaten ghost-pepper infused food before, and there's a specific flavor to ghost peppers beyond searing heat. I was pleased to find that flavor in this sauce, turning it from what could have been just extra-hot buffalo sauce into something better.

In my opinion, it's hard to screw up chicken wings, but the Heart Attack Shack deserves commendation for doing burgers, fries and wings well. I didn't order nachos because I valued my life and the integrity of my stomach, but next time I go, I think they will be hard to refuse.

THE VERDICT

I can only try to put into words what a gluttonous feast this was, but you have to see for yourself. Again, I can't overstate how reasonable the prices were. The cost of my sinful display was a meager $15, and I wasn't even able to finish it all.

On a normal night, I would have gotten a more reasonable burger and a "medium" order of fries, which would have been under $9. I thought about it, and that's roughly the cost of a medium Big Mac meal at McDonald's with fries and a drink. When you put it in those terms, the Heart Attack Shack is worth every penny. I probably will only go about once a month, but that's more out of respect for my arteries than anything.

Contact Shane Foley at sfoley@timesfreepress.com.

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