Review: 'Thor: The Dark World': Boredom and bedlam

photo Chris Hemsworth is Thor in Marvel's "Thor: The Dark World."
photo Tom Hiddleston as Loki, left, brings spark to Chris Hemsworth's cranky Thor.

About the Film'THOR: THE DARK WORLD'Rating: PG-13 or sequences of intense sci-fi action and violence and some suggestive content.Running time: 1 hour, 52 minutes.

Thor is a bore.

While 2011's "Thor" had some heart, warmth and genuine character growth to raise it above the ordinary, "Thor: The Dark World" has none. It's a lumbering ox of a movie that lurches and stumbles rather than flows, alternating boredom and bedlam. It's simply another link in the multi-billion-dollar Marvel movies chain. You can practically hear the cash register going "Cha-ching!"

Perhaps we've just seen too many of these superhero movies at this point. We know what's going to happen -- and not happen. The superhero is going to win (it's a superhero, after all); no one of importance is going to die (hey! you've signed contracts for sequels already); there's going to be three big, boomer action pieces, one in the first third, one in the second and the destruction-porn blowout at the end.

"The Dark World" follows that script to the lockstep letter, but it fails to offer anything that hasn't been seen before. Worse, it doesn't significantly advance the story or go anywhere interesting. Except for the final battle, which throws in some trans-dimensional physics to make it interesting, the action sequences are meh. And, in between those sequences, the plot sags and drags and gets you checking your watch.

Thor is, well, Thor, and tends to favor brawn over brains. He's still all about honor and saving lives and doing what's right, but he's no fun. Chris Hemsworth remains the perfect-looking actor for the role and he continues to display a roguish charm, but they've excised the humor from the character and all you're left with is a dour, kinda cranky guy.

The only time "The Dark World" generates any kind of spark is when Tom Hiddleston is onscreen as Loki. Hiddleston has nailed Loki so well, playing him with a malevolent, mischievous glee, you can't take your eyes off him. And he gets all the best lines in the film. When he and Hemsworth are together, they display a real sense of brotherly antagonism/camaraderie that elevates the scenes and gives the movie its only real sense of lift.

What's the story, you ask? Does it matter? OK, then. The Dark Elves, who like things to be gloomy and overcast, were defeated eons ago by Borr, Odin's father, and considered dead. Their weapon, the Aether (pronounce it like it doesn't have the unnecessary "A"), has been put somewhere "no one can find it." Yeah, they really say that in the movie and, as everyone knows, that means someone's going to find it.

The Aether is basically a writhing cloud of bad mojo that's going to ruin everything for everyone if it's unleashed so, of course, the Dark Elves come back and try to unleash it.

Superhero movies live and die by their villains, and that's another issue with "The Dark World." The villain, a Dark Elf named Malekith (Chris Eccleston, the one-season Doctor Who), has all the personality of an angry doorknob. He inspires no tension, no fear, no nothing.

As the love interest, Natalie Portman is not given much to do and doesn't do much with it. While her character, Jane Foster, is central to the plot, she's basically the wallpaper that Thor loves.

Kat Dennings, as Jane's assistant Darcy, and Stellan Skarsgard, as scientist Erik Selvig, lighten up the mood with comic relief that borders on clownish, but it's a sad sign when the secondary characters are more interesting than the main ones.

Contact Shawn Ryan at sryan@timesfreepress.com or 423-757-6327.

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