Let's handle our business, and we'll do it here.
Happy high school football Friday everyone.
Here's a primo primer on numbers to know around the Chattanooga area courtesy of TFP sports editor Stephen Hargis.
Also, since it's the rules and all, here's Paschall on a key part of the UT secondary.
Which leads us to our Rushmores.
Rushmore of all-time leading actors, and as a couple of you noted, De Niro's M.O. is not the traditional leading man. Heck, a slew of guys who would be considered among the best of this generation are not the traditional 'leading man' figure. Redford is a leading man. So is Newman. Cary Grant and we'll close with Bogart, but am open. That said De Niro's one of the best to ever read a script from his generation.
Rushmore of Steve Carell vehicles. "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," "The Office," Brick Tamland and Gru. But his is better than most realize. (Visor tip to some of the suggestions from Vader.)
Rushmore of Ben Affleck. "The Accountant," which I am higher on than most. "Argo" (bleep yourself), "Good Will Hunting," and of course "Dazed and Confsued." And that's leaving off some good ones, including his very convincing role as nutbar Nike founder Phil Knight in "Air."
Rushmore of Steve Martin movies — man, we were actor-heavy this week — and who had a better collection of comedy movies. We'll do the first part first. "The Jerk" is on the short list of funniest movies ever made. "Planes, Trains and Automobiles," which is a sneaky great quotable movie considering, "You're going the wrong way — how does he know where we're going" as well as "How cold do you think it is? 1." Next for me is "Parenthood," which he is magnificent in, and I'll close with "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels," which means we leave off "Roxanne," "Father of the Bride" — "Armani does not make a navy blue tuxado, Mr. Banks" — and a personal fav in "Three Amigos."
From Jay
Who has the best collection of comedies? Thanks and love your work.
Jay,
Great question. Great name. Great insight.
And these are the types of questions we are here for.
Eddie Murphy is the MJ of this category, especially if we are going to contain them to Rushmore catalogs. As great as Martin's top seven are above — and he has a few others that could give arguably the best top 10 of any actor of my lifetime when you add a great turn in "Baby Mama" as well a few others — phenomenal.
But Murphy's apex of "Trading Places," "Coming to America," "Beverly Hills Cop" and "Raw" (which was a stand-up routine released as a movie) were each tears-down-your-face, laugh-so-loud-you-missed-other-jokes funny.
Jim Carey has a place at this table. So does Chevy Chase, who has a top-heavy top-four, but "Caddyshack" and "Fletch" are like Ruth and Gehrig — all-timers. Heck, Bill Murray's "Stripes" and "Caddyshack" double-play is right there too.
Carell has a fine catalog of work, too.
But I will stand by Murphy.
From JJ
Your picks are pretty mediocre — kind of like your writing, huh? I guess that's how you stay in Chattanooga for 20-plus years, huh?
Keep on being your trifling, flip-flopping, RINO B.S. to yourself, Jay.
JJ,
Thanks for reading and for the chance to respond.
First, I would have to question your definition of mediocre when it comes to sports picks. If you are talking totals this week, we have so far had two winnings days and two losing days, so yeah, maybe that's a touch mediocre per se. But the totals — 3-0, 1-2, 1-2, 3-0 — kind of speak to a different story.
Since we started this last October — and I know I have a couple of regulars around these parts who read everyday and would be happy to vouch for our daily totals, updates and reporting — we are now at plus-57.26 units after having the Mets minus-1.5, Dodgers-Brewers under 8.5 and Browns plus-4 last night.
That's mediocrity to you? Well, then I guess I can understand the prism with which you still view Donald Trump a Republican then.
Trumpers know he's the original RINO, right, as in he spent most of the my formative years being a card-carrying Democrat. And regardless of which party he wants to be associated with, Trump is either 100% RINO or DINO or IINO (Independent in name only) because the only thing Trump cares about is Trump.
That he originally ran on "draining the swamp" is a classic punchline and an all-time misnomer up there with H.W. Bush saying, "Read my lips — no new taxes" before raising taxes. (Not all that surprising both those cats were one-termers, huh?)
Drain the swamp? Trump's only motivation is to be the biggest, most feared Gator in that quagmire known as national and global politics.
RINO? OK. Maybe in today's outlook of the fractured Republican Party that is further from the party of Reagan than it's ever been in my lifetime.
I've never voted for a Democrat. And I vote with my wallet, so I will not vote for Joe Biden.
And I know it's relatively easy to write in Tim Scott or another Republican choice that won't make me want to take a shower when voting in Tennessee because Biden won't win this state even if Peyton Manning and the ghost of Pat Summitt endorsed him.
That smart, hard-working and good Americans are still being fooled by Trump's carnival barking antics and we're not demanding better choices for the most important job in the world than eight years of Trump, Hillary and Sleepy Joe is how truly broken our system is.
(P.S. As for my writing, I know my style is not for everyone. And yes, I got fired from ESPN Radio a few years ago. But we're still in Chattanooga primarily because this is where we wanted to raise our kids, who thankfully take after their momma and are exceptional.)
From JoeDon
JG
When there are opposing accusations such as the Oher-Tuohy squabble, the truth is usually somewhere in the middle.
If it's truthful that Michael Oher has received no compensation from the movie royalties, then that is reprehensible and shame on the Tuohys.
So .... Would the movie about Jay Greeson's writing life be more like Woodward and Berstein in "All the President's Men" or more like Oscar Madison in the "The Odd Couple"?
You're a true Prose Pro.
JoeDon,
Far from Woodward and Bernstein. And those newsroom shots with all the smoke and teletype and all of it? Wow.
I have been doing this long enough that I can remember stopping at a Waffle House, using a pay phone and dictating a high school football game story though.
You whippersnappers ask your folks what pay phones are OK.
Not really close to Oscar Madison either. More "Mr. Mom" — I do all the cooking at casa de la 5-at-10 these days — with a laptop.
In fact, with school back in, my mornings include this over-written (and for some mediocre) conversation as well as making four people breakfasts, two dog breakfasts, two school lunches and at least one pot of coffee. I start well before 6.
Heck, that could be a farmer meets Mr. Mom meets Oscar Madison, I suppose.
As you write about "The Blindside" stuff, you're correct, there's the Oher side, the Tuohy side and likely the truth.
Author Michael Lewis — arguably the best doing it these days — sounded as if he sides more with the Tuohys for whatever that's worth, and said Oher declined the royalty checks.
I have known for years Oher hated the movie version of his story.
From Steve
Jay, been reading your columns since you were back in sports.
You used to go team-by-team in the SEC and guess whether they were going to go over or indeed their projected win totals.
Do you still do that, because it seems even more fitting now that we could bet on those?
Thanks and hope to see you at a football game this season.
Steve,
Great to hear from you, and yes, I used to do those. Have not done them in a few, but hey, let's roll with what we got, right? Lines are from FanDuel. Let's do the East today and the West next week. Deal? Deal.
Let's find some mediocrity.
SEC East (listed alphabetically)
Florida (over/under 5.5) — Dunks with McNeese, Charlotte and Vandy, but the rest of the schedule is tough. At Utah in the opener. The most likely SEC foes against whom the Gators would be considered favorites are all away (at UK, at South Carolina and at Missouri.) Add in Georgia on a neutral site, a trip to LSU and FSU and UT coming to the Swamp, do the Gators have the toughest schedule in the SEC? Under at plus-110.
Georgia (over/under 11.5) — Yes, these numbers are for regular-season games only. Which means Vegas is asking if you think Georgia runs the table. My answer is: yes, I do. But man, betting on zero miscues/bad bounces/you name it is kind of taxing. Still the possible loss is at UT in November, and while I think UT is going to be a contender, I know Georgia already is one. Over at plus-116.
Kentucky (7.5) — Like most of the league, UK should go 4-0 out of conference. Vandy is there. So is Mississippi State. Missouri and the Gators are headed to the Commonwealth, but can UK sweep all of those? Under at minus-144.
Missouri (6.5) — Two loseable out of conference games (Kansas State and at Memphis) plus a sour West draw of contenders LSU and Arkansas — and UT and Georgia — pushes us hard under on these Tigers. Under at minus-142.
South Carolina (6.5) — Spencer Rattler could have a monster year, and have you seen Nyckoles Harbor, a 4.4 WR who is built (no kidding) like Jadeveon Clowney? Plus, the schedule is doable. A lot of this will swing on the opener against UNC and the Heels' star QB, but mid-level SEC always > mid-level ACC, and I think Beamer will find a way. Over at plus-144.
Tennessee (9.5) — Hard not to like this one, friends. UT will be an underdog two times — at Bama and at home against Georgia — and both of those lines will likely be under a TD. (If either line grows, the over has already been busted.) Plus, UT's schedule is spaced very well. The first back-to-back SEC test is split by an early October bye. Over at plus-146
Vandy (3.5) — Under is plus money, but that's as much for the non-conference schedule as anything. Hawaii, Alabama A&M, Wake Forest and UNLV. If you want the over you better be banking the Dores sweeping through September, because it's hard to see them doing much in the league. I'm going under and taking the plus-138.
Have a great weekend, friends.